Navigating Big Emotions, Grief & Trauma During Pregnancy In The Holiday Season

The holidays are often painted as a season of joy — sparkling lights, gatherings, celebration, and gratitude. But for many expectant mothers, this time of year can also surface big emotions, unhealed grief, depression, or past trauma. And when you're pregnant, those emotions can feel even heavier.

If this is where you find yourself today, I want you to hear this clearly: You are not alone. Your emotions are not a burden. And God is near to you, especially now.

As a doula, I've walked with many mothers who carry both the miracle of life and the weight of a hurting heart. As a believer, I know firsthand that Jesus meets us in these places with comfort, compassion, and truth. Below is encouragement, scripture, and practical support for walking through emotional heaviness during the holidays — while pregnant, and while deeply loved by a gentle Father.

1. Your Emotions Are Valid and Seen by God

Pregnancy is a time of enormous physical, hormonal, and emotional change. Layer the holidays on top — with expectations, memories, family dynamics, or financial strain — and it’s completely understandable to feel overwhelmed.

Scripture reminds us:

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”— Psalm 34:18

Your Father does not shame you for feeling sad, anxious, or exhausted. He draws nearer.

2. When Grief and Pregnancy Collide

Maybe you’re grieving a loved one who isn’t here this Christmas.Maybe last year looked very different and the contrast hurts.Maybe past trauma or loss is resurfacing.

Grief doesn't pause just because you're pregnant — and that’s okay.

Jesus Himself understands grief intimately. Scripture says:

“Jesus wept.”— John 11:35

He doesn't rush your healing. He sits with you in it.

Gentle things you can do:

• Light a candle in honor of someone you miss

• Journal prayers to God about your grief

• Allow yourself to cry without apologizing

• Share with a trusted friend, pastor, or your doula

3. When Depression Creeps In

Depression during pregnancy is surprisingly common — and NOTHING to feel ashamed about. But the holiday pressure to “be joyful” can make it harder.

If you find yourself struggling to get out of bed, losing interest in things you usually love, or feeling emotionally numb, please know:

You are not failing.You are not a bad mom.You are not faithless.

You are human, precious, and in need of gentleness.

God declares over you:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”— Matthew 11:28

Notice He didn’t say “Come to Me once you pull yourself together.”He meets you as you are.

Helpful supports:

• Speak openly with your doctor or midwife

• Schedule a session with a Christian counselor

• Let trusted friends serve you with meals, childcare, or companionship

• Ask your doula to help you create a mental health support plan

  
  

4. Setting Boundaries During the Holidays

Pregnancy is already a sacred season of protecting your peace. If you’re emotionally struggling, boundaries may be one of the most loving gifts you can give yourself.

It is perfectly okay to say:

• “I won’t be able to attend this year.”

• “We’re keeping the holidays slow and quiet.”

• “I’m not comfortable discussing that topic.”

• “Thank you, but I need to rest today.”

This is not selfish. This is stewardship.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”— Proverbs 4:23

5. Inviting the Holy Spirit Into Your Emotional Space

Your womb is a holy place right now — and your heart can be one too.

Try this simple prayer when emotions feel too heavy:

“Lord, I invite You into every place that hurts.Fill my home, my mind, and my baby with Your peace.Wrap me in Your comfort and remind me I am held.”

Even a whispered prayer is powerful.

“The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace.”— Psalm 29:11

6. Practical Ways to Care for Yourself This Season

Here are gentle rhythms to ground you:

🕊 Slow Down

Give yourself permission to do less.Pregnancy alone is a full-time job for your body.

🕊 Get Sunlight + Fresh Air Daily

Even a 10-minute walk can lift fog and reduce anxiety.

🕊 Nourish Your Body

Stable blood sugar helps stabilize emotions:

• Protein every few hours

• Hydrating herbal teas

• Warm, whole foods

🕊 Connect with Someone Safe

Sometimes the most healing words are simply:“I’m struggling today.”

🕊 Create a Peaceful Moment

• Worship instrumental music

• A warm bath with magnesium

• Reading Psalms aloud

• Laying a hand over your belly and praying

7. Remember: Your Baby Feels Loved Through Your Healing

You do not harm your baby by having big emotions.What nourishes your baby is your willingness to take care of yourself.

When you choose rest…When you ask for help…When you turn your heart toward Jesus…

You are mothering beautifully.

Your baby is growing inside a woman who is seeking peace, who is choosing healing, and who is loved deeply by God.

A Final Word of Encouragement

If you are reading this as a mother carrying life while also carrying pain, hear this blessing over you:

You are held, seen, and supported. Your emotions are not too much for God.

May Jesus fill your holiday season with unexpected moments of comfort, gentle rest, and the reminder that Immanuel means: God is with you. Right here. Right now. In every emotion.